Sharla Dawn Gorder

I posted this poem on Facebook about a year ago, right after Mom died.  These words kept swirling around my mind—“You plunge into my nameless pain (the deep end where my feet don’t touch) and tread there tirelessly with me.”  You, my friends, were my salvation then, and you are my hope now.

I had written this poem—“Yes”—nearly thirty years ago, for my BFF, Melendy Koch (Fabian).  Our friend Liz Martin painted the tulip on canvas, and we had it framed and gave it to Mellie for her birthday.

Yes

My friend,
I cherish you.
You shine for me
When I am overcast.
You plunge into my nameless pain
(the deep end where my feet don’t touch)
And tread there tirelessly with me.
You embellish my joy.
Your eyes leak my tears.
My friend,
You are sparks.
You are cookies and milk.
You are an armful of tulips.
You are Yes.

I ran across the poem this morning, and today the last line really resonates with me—“You are Yes.”  How blessed I am to be embraced in this circle of affirming love and acceptance.  How blessed I am to have friends.

I never would have believed that the gift of such intimate friendship would keep recurring throughout my life, but it has, and I am so grateful.

Yes, the poem is as true for me today as it has ever been, but the context has changed, and I love the way it has morphed into a declaration of love for not just one cherished friend, but for many.  I was still in my 20’s when I wrote the poem for Melendy.  We were both single and without children, living in LA, flying the friendly skies. Life was pretty uncomplicated (though, clearly, I didn’t think so then).  We both had the time and nearly boundless energy to lavish on friendships.  All of those things I wrote about in the poem, Melendy could be to me—and I to her.

But with the advent of marriage and children and all the other grown-up stuff that tags along, our roles with each other changed; they had to.  And though Melendy will forever and ever and ever be my BFF, she has been joined on that pedestal by many others.

My current BFF is a composite, and I treasure you all—and not just for who you are to me, but for who you inspire me to be with you.  I am a better person because you are in my life.

So, here’s my poem to you:

Yes

My friend(s),
I cherish you (all of you).
You shine for me
When I am overcast (Michele and Vanessa).
You plunge into my nameless pain,
(the deep end where my feet don’t touch)
And tread there tirelessly with me (Kelly and Betty).
You embellish my joy (Jody and Debbie).
Your eyes leak my tears (Lynas and Dawn).
My friends,
You are sparks (Karen and Tabitha).
You are an arm full of tulips (Alana and Kylie).
You are Yes.

I hope that I am Yes to you too, maybe not in all capacities, but in some—Think about it for a second.  Who cheers you up when your soul feels overcast? Who treads the deep end with you when you’re afraid?  Who just can’t wait to celebrate you and your talents?  Whose heart breaks in unison with yours?  Who ignites your creative spirit?  Who is pure, delicious comfort?  Who is perpetually fresh and beautiful?

Now tell them.  Yeah, go ahead.  I just did.  It feels great—James Taylor sings, “Once you tell somebody the way that you feel, you can feel it beginning to ease…”

Shower the people, folks.

Yes.